Breaking Away Read online

  With that, he slammed the door shut and she didn’t stop him. Instead, she crumbled to the floor and hoped she drowned in her tears. She had thought she was making the right decision but if she was, why did it hurt so badly?

  Slamming the door behind him, Phillip stomped through the house to the fridge for a beer. He didn’t care if it was only seven in the morning, and he sure as hell didn’t care that he just hailed a cab in only a pair of boxers. All he did care about was the fact that his heart was breaking in his chest, and he felt like smashing someone’s face in. How did she make any fucking sense? She loved him, but she didn’t want to be with him because she was still holding on to what the douche did to her. It was fucking stupid! She was insane and, fuck, he still loved her.

  Banging his head on the fridge, he couldn’t grasp what had just happened. He felt so good when she uttered the words, felt like he had just gotten his fix of her, but then she ruined it by crying and saying she couldn’t love him. She blew his ego to hell and probably didn’t give two shits while doing it. It was gut wrenching, watching her cry, because all he wanted to do was wrap her up in his arm and make her stop. Kiss away those tears, promise only to make happy ones fall for the rest of their lives, but she wasn’t giving him the chance to.

  Ahhh! Letting out a yell, he punched the fridge and then very quickly regretted it when the pain shot up his arm. Damn it. Opening the freezer, he placed his hand on an ice tray and forced the tears back. He wasn’t going to cry. Not over someone that didn’t want him. He had done that time and time again, but not this time. If she didn’t want him, fine, he’d pick up his shattered heart and move on. To what, he wasn’t sure, but the great thing was that he still had Claire. He’d always have Claire. Well, that was until she turned eighteen, went to college, and left him. Then he’d be alone.

  So fucking alone because no one could ever be Reese.

  Sucking in a deep breath, he let it out slowly as he shook his head. He wanted to go back and beg her to reconsider, but why should he? He had done nothing wrong. He had played by her rules, he had loved her, and she couldn’t even try to do the same for him when she was there. She only had to allow herself to follow her heart and he would be there waiting for her, but she wouldn’t and he couldn’t understand why. It all came back to the question on why he wasn’t enough? What was he doing wrong?

  “Are you okay?”

  He looked over his shoulder to find Claire in a long t-shirt and PJ pants. “Fine.”

  “Okay, then why did you get out of a cab in boxer and down a beer before slamming your head on the fridge and then punching it?”

  How long had she been standing there?

  “Don’t worry about it, Claire, go back to bed.”

  “I gotta go to school.”

  “Skip it,” he said, leaning his head back on the fridge.

  “Wow, yeah, I can’t do that but thanks anyway. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing, I said nothing,” he snapped. When he turned to see her with a shocked look on her face, he felt like shit. “Please, Claire, not right now, just go. Give me a minute and I’ll take you to school.”

  She didn’t say anything for a second but then asked, “It’s Reese, isn’t it? Did she break up with you?”

  He didn’t want to bring her into this but soon he was nodding his head as his heart shattered in his chest all over again. When he felt her come up beside him, placing her hand on his back, he became limp and just leaned on the fridge, defeated.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered, and he knew she was crying. When he opened his eyes to look at her and saw the tears pooling in her bright blue eyes before rushing down her face, he felt even more like shit.

  “Why are you crying, Claire? Don’t do that. I can’t handle your tears, too.”

  Wiping her hands across her cheeks, she whispered, “I know, and I’m sorry, but I just had so many plans for us. I wanted her to live with us and be happy with us. I hate that you are hurting, because I don’t want you to ever hurt. I just want you to be happy because you make everyone else happy, and I’m just so sorry that she did this to you.”

  He shook his head, wrapping her up in his arms and holding her tight against his chest. “Don’t be. This isn’t your fault, and I’m going to be okay. I have you, and like I said, no matter what, she will always be in your life.”

  “I know, but I wanted her in yours, too.”

  His lip quivered and then it happened, a single tear spilled over, running along his cheek and into her hair as he whispered, “Me too.”

  Erik made quick work of changing Dimitri’s diaper as Phillip sat on the floor, playing with a zoo set. When he was done, he sat him back down and then followed, crossing his leg as Dimitri reached for a zebra. After dropping Claire off at school, Phillip called Erik to see if it was okay for him to come over. Luckily for him, Piper was out doing stuff for Harper’s baby shower, which was the following day, leaving the house to Erik, Dimitri, and now Phillip’s problems.

  “So she tells you she loves you but she can’t be with you, because you are going to break her heart?”

  Phillip nodded as he made a giraffe dance with Dimitri’s zebra. “Yeah and the thing is, she isn’t even giving me a chance. She is categorizing me with that bastard Kevin, and I would never do that to her. I love her!”

  “Dude, I told you she is a man eater.”

  “That’s the thing, she isn’t. She is actually an amazing woman. Tough as nails and man, she keeps me on my toes, but she has a heart of gold that she hides from everyone. I really do believe that she was made for me, and I don’t care how girly that sounds.”

  Erik scoffed. “No worries, when a dude is really in love, he turns into a freaking girl. It’s scary. So stay away from girls, they are icky, and will make you do stupid things, okay buddy?”

  Phillip smiled when Dimitri reached out, taking a hold of Erik’s lip and giggling. He wanted this. He wanted a little guy and no, he didn’t want it now, but he wanted it someday with Reese.

  “I just don’t understand why I’m not enough, you know? I used to feel so worthless, but then I started playing for the Assassins and things were good, great even. Then Claire came into my life and yeah, it wasn’t easy but then it was, and I was happy. Then Reese comes into my life, and everything fell into place. I knew this was the life I wanted. Then she dumps me and all those old feelings come back, bringing me down. I mean, do you hear me? I sound like a chick! Jeez, hand me the latest copy of TeenBeat and let’s gush over One Direction. I’m disgusting!”

  Erik laughed as he shook his head. “Phillip, this is the shitty part of love. It can take you to the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.”

  “Tell me what to do, help me.”

  Erik shook his head. “I suck at this shit, go to Shea.”

  “No, Shea will tell me he told me so. He told me to watch out. I knew I had to, I thought I had prepared myself, but it just hurts so bad.”

  “I’m sorry, man, but I don’t know what to say because in my eyes, Reese isn’t the settling down type, but then I don’t know her like you do.”

  “But she is, if she’d allow herself to be. She loves me, she admitted it, but instead of acting on those feelings, she shielding herself from them. From me.”

  “Yeah, I don’t know,” Erik said with a shrug. “I’m sorry I’m no help.”

  Before Phillip could say anything, Piper walked in the room with her hands on her hips. “He has nothing to say because he was the Reese in our relationship. He pushed me away, Phillip, you saw him do it. However, I kept fighting, didn’t I, and now look at us. You can’t give up on her. She loves you, everyone knows this.”

  Phillip hated when Piper did her ninja sneak in but at this particular moment, he could use her help. “I get that, but I have fought. I put all of me in, and she threw me away. How do I come back from that? You weren’t going to fight for him after he left you. You were done, and now I am done.”

  Piper paused and then nodded. “Y