Let It Be Me Read online

  “I’m not whoring anywhere,” I cry out, trying to get out of his grip but he isn’t letting go. His hand tangles in my hair, squeezing so hard that tears spring to my eyes. I scream but stop moving, hoping to relieve some of the pain. It doesn’t work. He pulls harder.

  “Not now you aren’t, but I know you. You’re a hot little thing, ready to fuck anything except me.”

  “I can’t have sex; I’ve told you this!”

  He pulls hard, making my head fall back. “That’s right and don’t make me make sure that you never have sex again, because I will. Let me get word that you’re trying to get with this doctor and I swear, Vi. I swear it will not be good. Don’t fucking do anything stupid.”

  Tears are rushing down my face and my face is burning from where he has his thumbnail. “I’m not. I won’t.”

  He shoves me away and I fall back into the counter, holding my face as the tears continue to fall.

  “That’s right. Now sit down.”

  I don’t want to move. I want to fall into the fetal position and pray he goes away, but when he cuts me a look, I take the steps to the chair, and fall into it without looking at him. Taking in a shuddered breath, I wipe my face as he says, “stop crying. I didn’t even hurt you. I wouldn’t do this if you’d just fucking listen. You make me so fucking mad, Vi. Shit. Don’t you know how much I love you? I don’t want anyone to have you but me.”

  Looking down, my tears fall on the paper in front of me. My tears mix with the ink, creating purple-black pools and running down the page as my heart pounds against my chest. I don’t know what I’m going to do. Maybe I should quit but as soon as I think that, I know that I can’t quit my job. I love the people I work with, I love the position I have, and most of all I want to see more of Tucker. I need to see more of him. I want to know who he is. I want to know things about him. Is he married? Does he have kids? Is he single? I have to know. I don’t know why because more than likely curiosity is going to get me in trouble, but something inside me is pushing me to know. It’s pushing me past my fear of Rob, and I have no clue what that means.

  I feel Rob’s eyes on me, and when I look up, he is moving his dark-as-night hair out of his eyes. He is waiting and I know what I’m supposed to say.

  “I’m sorry.”

  But I’m not.

  Not in the least.

  For the most part, I was able to keep my distance from Rob and Tucker for the next three days. It involved me staying in my room or – in the living room when Rob was in our room – but I managed. He, of course, tried to talk to me, and act like he didn’t almost rip off my chin but I wasn’t having it. I answered what I needed to and ignored everything else. Usually after one of our altercations he tries to suck up to me, showing his old affections and telling me everything I needed him to say three years ago. I usually let him, but not this time. I keep my distance, something I’ve never done before, and I’m pretty sure he noticed but I don’t care. Another thing I’ve never done. Usually I’m so scared and worried about pleasing him, I do what he asks, but not this time. I’m pissed and my fucking face hurts, damn it.

  It may have been easy to ignore Rob, but with Tucker, I’m surprised that I can hold myself together at work. The last three days have been hell on me but I’ve managed to keep my lust-filled thoughts under control. Mostly because he was very busy following his father around and winning over his new patients. Not that he had to try hard. From what I’ve noticed, it was easy for him. He’s a people person. He’s charming and sweet, just like his father. When he unleashes that smile, the big one that shows his deep dimples, I swear everyone in the office swoons while I just try to breathe.

  I’m fanning myself at this very moment just thinking of those sexy dimples.

  I’ve done well keeping my lusty thoughts to myself but some of the office staff don’t know how to do the same.

  “Did you see his ass in those slacks? He said earlier he was hot and took off his jacket and good Lord Almighty I wanted to burn that jacket so he never wears it again!” Tammy gushes while the other nurses giggle.

  We’re having a small meeting during lunch, going over the questionnaire I have for everyone while the doctors are out. The fact that Tucker is gone for these hours each day is bittersweet. On one end, I can actually breathe but on the other, I just want to stare at him. His office is across from mine and when he is in there with his legs on his desk doing things on his laptop, I can’t help but steal glances. His strong legs crossed at the ankles and propped up on his desk, eyes turned down in consternation and he reviews a patient’s chart. When he bites down on that sexy bottom lip of his, my whole body catches on fire and I have to fight off the gooseflesh that spreads its way across my skin.

  Of course, I’m disgusted in myself afterward because really, what would someone as gorgeous as Tucker McCloud want with me? There is no way I’m up to Tucker’s standards. He’s probably married to some gorgeous model with the longest legs he’s ever seen, and has little model babies, but I can fantasize, right? The image of me on my desk with him between my legs is one hell of a fantasy.

  One. Long. Hot. Sexy. Fantasy.

  “I know, right? He is so sexy, if I was twenty years younger and maybe fifty pounds thinner, I swear I’d be on him like white on rice,” Ms. Yolanda says, snapping me from my daydream. She has everyone laughing, even me. Ms. Yolanda is our oldest staff member at fifty-four and she is crazy, obviously.

  “He’d be in a world of trouble, Ms. Yolanda, if you had your sights on him,” I say with a smile, my hand on her shoulder.

  She laughs as she nods. “Damn right, he would. You know, honey,” she says, looking at me so intently I feel like she can see the fantasy behind my eyes not mere seconds ago, “you two would be cute together. Maybe you should get with him. You know he’s single, darling, so go after him. Share all the juicy details so we all can live vicariously through you.”

  Everyone laughs and my mind whirls.

  He’s single? Oh. My. But that doesn’t matter. Right?

  I slowly shake my head, my cheeks red as a tomato. “Sorry ladies, I’m married.”

  Unfortunately.

  I’m beside myself but I look up when I notice all the laughing has stopped.

  “You are?” Tammy asks, her face scrunched up in confusion.

  “I didn’t know that,” Ms. Yolanda says with her brows to her hairline.

  “You’re so young, though,” Annabelle, our receptionist, says. “What are you, like twenty-one?”

  I shrug, hating all the attention on me. “I’m twenty-three. I got married when I was twenty.”

  The conversation stops, but still all eyes are on me. I start to squirm in my seat. I hate when all the attention is on me. I feel weird and self-conscious, so I quickly clear my throat and say, “Anyway, so back to the reason we’re here. What are some thing you guys would like to change around here?”

  When Ms. Yolanda’s hand comes up, I smile. “Yes ma’am.”

  Everyone’s attention goes to her, thankfully, and with the straightest face ever, she says, “I think clothing should be optional for Doctor McCloud Jr.”

  Peals of laughter burble up and out of my chest and I snort from the force.

  The only thing my nutty staff could come up with was a clothing allowance and maybe raises and more vacation time. All of these are understandable, and I had already written them down before I had the meeting. When I left the meeting, I had the biggest smile on my face. I’m excited to have some control here, to be able to relay all the ideas I’ve come up with to Tucker, but once I get to my office, my smile falters. I’ve missed a call from my mother, and since she called during my working hours, I know she isn’t calling just to chat. Reaching for my phone, I dial my mother’s number and wait until she came on the line.

  “Mom?”

  “Violet, baby, things are bad.”

  I take in a deep breath, my heart picking up speed from my mother’s words. “Grandma?”

  “Yes, she isn�