Vet in a Spin Read online

and phosphorus under her skin. By the time I had finished and rubbed

  away the subcutaneous fluid Number Eight' Seven was loo king decidedly

  happier.

  I didn't hurry over cleaning and put ting away my injection outfit and

  re~ soaping my arms because I knew that every minute would bring back

  strength: to my patient.

  The lightning response to intravenous calcium has al ways afforded me

  a: simple pleasure and when I pushed my arm in again the difference

  we.

  remarkable. The previously flaccid uterus gripped at my hand and as

  the cow~ went into a long expulsive effort she turned her head, looked

  back at me and opened her mouth in a muffled bellow. It was not a

  sound of pain but rather as though she was saying,

  "I'm back in business now."

  "All right, my lass," I replied.

  "I'll stay with you till it's all over."

  At other times I might have been a little chary of being overheard

  convPr~ir~ with a cow, but with the clamour of buckets and the nonstop

  radio there was no chance of that happening.

  l i l ~: - - v: blasting of the I knew that I had to guide the calf

  back into the correct position and that would take time, but I had a st

  range sense of one-ness with this animal becaux neither of us seemed to

  be of the slightest importance in the present setting.

  Ai I lay there face down on the concrete which grew harder all the time

  and with the milkers stumbling over my prostrate form I felt very much

  alone. There we.

  just myself and Number Eighty Seven for it.

  Another thing I missed was the sense of occasion. There was a com

  pensati~ in many an arduous calving in the feeling of a little drama

  being enacted; the worried farmer, attentive stocks men, the danger of

  losing the calf or even the mother it was a gripping play and there was

  no doubt the vet was the leadin.;] man. He may even be the villain but

  he was number one. And here I was no' a scrabbling nonentity with

  hardly a mention in the cast. It was the shape things to come.

  And yet . . . and yet . . . the job was still there. I lifted the

  calf's lower jaw a' as the cow gave a heave I eased it over the brim of

  the pelvis. Then I grop for the tiny legs and straightened them as

  another expulsive effort pushed d little creature towards me. He was

  definitely on his way now. ;~ I didn't rush things just lay there and

  let the cow get on with it. My wo.

  moment was when one of the men came to put the milking machine on t

  temperamental animal on my right. As he tried to step up beside her

  she swuq round, cocked her tail and sent a jet of faeces cascading

  across my back.

  The man pushed her back into place, slipped on the teat cups then

  lifted t hose which was Iying ready for swilling down the byre. A

  moment later I f the icy flow of water playing from my shoulders to my

  hips then the applicati of a spare udder cloth as the helpful fellow

  cleaned me off.

  "Thanks very much," I gasped. And I was really grateful. It was thc

  o' attention I had received all morning

  Within half an hour the feet appeared at the vulva followed by a wet m

  whose nostrils twitched reassuringly. But they were big feet this

  would b.

  bull calf and his final entry into the world could be a tight squeeze.

  ~' I got into a sit ting position and gripped a slippery cloven hoof in

  each he Leaning back, feet against the dung channel, I addressed Number

  Eighty SGt again.

  "Come on, old lass. A couple of good shoves and we're there."

  r~: ~.

  she responded with a mighty inflation of the abdomen and the calf

  surged tOwards me as I pulled, giving me a glimpse of a broad forehead

  and a pair of Slightly puzzled eyes. For a moment I thought the ears

  were going to slip through but then the cow relaxed and the head

  disappeared back inside.

  ~Once more, girl!" I pleaded, and this time it seemed that she had

  decided to stop playing around and get the job over with. She gave a

  prolonged strain Which sent head and shoulders through, and as I hauled

  away I had only that momentary panic I al ways feel that the hips might

  jam in the pelvis. But this one didn't stick and came sliding

  beautifully on to my lap.

  puffing slightly, I got to my feet and parted the hind legs. Sure

  enough the little scrotum was there; he was a fine bull calf. I pulled

  some hay from the rack and dried him off and within minutes he was sit

  ting up, sniffing and snorting, king around him with interest.

  He wasn't the only interested party. His mother, craning round in her

  neck chain, gazed fascinatedly at the new arrival before releasing a

  deafening bellow.

  I seized the front feet again and pulled the calf up to the front of

  the stall where the cow after a brief examination began to lick him

  from head to tail. Then as I watched, entranced, she suddenly rose to

  her feet so that she could reach some of the little creature's more

  inaccessible corners.

  I smiled to myself. So that was that. She had got over the milk fever

  and had a nice live calf, too. All was well with Number Eighty

  Seven.

  ~vIr Black burn came up and stood by my side and I realised that the

  noise in ~-the byre had subsided. The milking was finished.

  The farmer took off his white hat and wiped away the sweat from his

  brow.

  "By yaw, that was a rush. We were shorthanded this morn in' and I was

  sure we were goin' to miss that milk feller. He's a terror won't wait

  a minute, and I've had to chase after 'im in a tractor with the churns

  afore now' As he finished speaking a hen leaped with a squawk from the

  rack, Mr . IBlack burn reached forward and lifted a warm new-laid egg

  out of the hay.

  He inspected it for a moment then turned to me.

  "Have you 'ad your breakfast ?"

  ~- "No, of course not."

  .tWell tell your missus to put this in the fry in' pan," he said,

  handing me the ~"Oh, thank you very much, Mr Black burn, I'll enjoy

  that."

  |He nodded and continued to stand there, gazing at the cow and calf.

  Dairy . If arming is one of the hardest ways of ma king a living and

  this pre-dawn turmoil was an every day occurrence in his life. But I

  knew he was pleased with my efforts because he faced me suddenly and

  his weathered features broke into a delighted grin. Without warning he

  gave me a friendly thump on the chest.

  "Good old Jim!" he said, and walked away.

  I dressed, got into the car and placed my egg with the utmost care on

  the dash, then I eased myself gingerly on to the seat, because that

  hosing had sent a pint or two of dirty water down into my underpants

  and sit ting down was ~ntensely uncomfortable.

  As I drove away the darkness was thinning into the grey beginning of a

  new day and around me the white bulk of the fells began to lift from

  the half light - massive, smooth and inexpressibly cold.

  I looked at the egg rocking gently on the dash, and smiled to myself. I

  could still see Mr Black burn's sudden grin, still f