Max Page 49


And there she stands, face all pinched with worry for me and in her hand an icy cold Molson beer that’s extended toward me in offering. She took off her Fournier jersey and only has on a pair of jeans and a black turtleneck sweater, her feet covered in fluffy socks.

Stepping in, I shut the door behind me and lock it. I shed my winter coat as my eyes go to the beer. “That for me?”

“Figured you could use it,” she says hesitantly and I now see that the worry in her eyes is not only for how I’m feeling after such a loss, but how I’m going to react. “They didn’t have any Molson in the minifridge so I went down to the bar in the lobby and got a few for you.”

I stare at the beer a minute, then slide my eyes to hers.

“Um . . . I can get more if you want some,” she adds quietly.

I hate that uncertainty in her voice. I hate the way she’s unsure of how I’ll be tonight after a loss. Or how I’ll treat her because I might be in a bad mood.

It’s just not something we’ve had to deal with yet in our relationship.

I walk farther into the room, straight to her. I take the Molson and turn to set it on the dresser that holds a large flat screen TV.

When I turn back to Jules, she looks up at me with sympathetic eyes tinged with quandary. I step closer, bring my hand to her face to0 lay my palm against her cheek before I slide it around her neck. My fingers go up into her long hair and I feel the cool silkiness slither over my skin. I sift my fingers through briefly before bring my hand to the back of her neck. My thumb idly grazes her skin while I look down at her.

Noting those eyes that I’ve come to realize are my favorite part of Jules, because they’re so expressive and she can communicate with their power alone. Her eyes speak to me when her lips don’t.

“Max?” she murmurs. “You okay?”

I nod at her with a smile, let my eyes roam her face for a moment before coming back to lock with hers. “I love you, Jules.”

A tiny gasp flutters past her lips and her eyes seem to burst with light, causing them to bloom into golden orbs, which then immediately start to shimmer with a translucent veil of tears. My hand moves from the back of her neck, back to her cheeks, where I rest my thumb, ready to catch any tears that fall.

“I was going to tell you last night,” I say softly. “Had it all planned . . . candlelight, roses, champagne. But honestly . . . it didn’t seem the right time because while last night was magical and romantic, it wasn’t really us, you know? I mean, not that I can’t be romantic, because I can, but it’s not the real us.”

She nods at me, and I think she’s getting what I’m saying, but just to be sure I continue on.

“But tonight . . . walking in here and seeing you after I just had a really shitty game, and ordinarily would just sulk and bitch and moan about my performance, I took one look at you standing there holding my favorite beer and I realized . . . this is us. Me coming to you after I’ve had a shit day, and you standing there waiting to take it on. Jules, this was the right time to tell you that I love you. In fact, this was the perfect time.”

I watch as she swallows hard and blinks her eyes to chase away the moisture. “I, um . . .” she says in a voice cracking with emotion and then coughs a little to clear it. “I never thought I’d love someone with the depth that I loved Melody. But then those kids came along, and I realized I was given a gift. And I never thought I’d have room in my life after them to love someone else that deeply, and then you came along, and I knew I’d been given a miracle. Max . . . I simply can’t help but to love you too. You’ve made it impossible for me to have anything less than love. I don’t know what I did to deserve it but I’ll be damned if I’m going to ever waste it or take it for granted. I just want to make you as happy as you make me.”

In my entire life, there has never been a moment I’ve experienced such as this one. Her words fill me up with such replete gratification . . . such tranquility . . . absolute realization that I just became a complete man.

I bring my other hand to her face, frame it and rub my thumbs along her jaw. “Big night for us, huh?”

She winces. “Well, except for the loss.”

“What loss?” I ask her with a grin, but she knows I haven’t forgotten it.

Merely that I’m choosing to ignore it because this is more important.

“I’m still not quite sure how this happened,” Jules says softly. “I mean . . . the chances on how we first met, or that you saw me for a second time at Sweetbrier. It had to be, right?”

“I think so,” I agree. “I think someone was telling us we’re meant for each other.”

She gives a small shake of her head . . . a bit of a skeptical move. “There are times I just don’t understand why you’re with me. My life has been a shit storm lately. And I come with three kids. What sane man wants that?”

Leaning down, I brush my lips against hers. “Babe . . . there’s no doubt, your life is a bit warty. But it’s because of those warts and the way you handle them that causes me to have such deep respect for you. That’s part of why I love you, not a reason for me not to.”

“Not sure it’s really hitting me . . . the enormity of what we just said to each other,” she murmurs.

“Or the implied commitment that brings,” I add on. “You’re stuck with me now, babe. Not going anywhere.”

She grins. “Don’t want you to.”

“On second thought,” I say mischievously, “I wouldn’t mind moving this to the bed.”

Her head turns slightly to look at the bed and then back to me with an impish smile. “Is this the part where you make love to me since we’ve now professed our deep feelings?”

I look to the bed and then back to her. “No,” I drawl out. “I’m still going to fuck you. But I’m going to do it while being deeply in love with you.”

Jules laughs, because that’s just Jules and her internal sense of humor is so closely matched with my own. Our teasing and lame jokes lobbed at each other are simply a part of the way we communicate. It’s part of what makes us both happy to be with each other. I love that despite the fact that Jules’ life is complicated, messy, and downright stressful, she still has the easy ability to laugh at any given time.

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